Wednesday, August 31, 2016

How to identify a gentleman?

Source:  quoteaddicts.com


Dictionary defines the word 'Gentleman' as a chivalrous, courteous or an honourable man.  Though the word relates more to a male, the topic we are going to discuss applies equally to females.   There are many articles floating on the internet about what qualities should a gentleman have. This post is not a listing of such qualities.  I would like to describe one real-life incident which depicts how observing a person's behaviour in a particular situation can help you in identifying whether he is a gentleman or not.

The car parking space at our office is at premium.  Hence it is necessary that the cars are parked in proper position to ensure that maximum cars get the benefit. To ensure that, we have few security guards which assist us in parking the car in a correct way.

When I arrived at the car park,  I saw a guard helping one of the employees to park his car.  However, ignoring the guard's advice, the employee parked the car in a manner he preferred the best.  When the employee got out of the car, guard was explaining to him that there is still some space towards the left where the car can be moved so that more cars can also be parked adjoining to that.

However the employee was not in a mood to listen.  The expression on his face was like 'who are you to tell me how to park the car?  You are just a security guard and I know it better.'  Instead of a constructive discussion about who is correct in this, the argument was between a 'white-collar' employee and a security guard.  I am sure, if instead of a security guard, that person was one of his colleagues or his boss, his behavior would have been different, more respectful.

How we treat the people whom we do not know, who are of income or social strata lower to us defines our character.  This is one of the important quality of a gentleman - to treat all with respect and courteously, irrespective of their position.

Observing minute details of a person helps us in identifying this. How he refers to an auto or a taxi driver?  Is it 'bhaiya / bhaisahab, side mein rukao' or is it an arrogant way of 'sunna nahi kya, left lena tha'.  Is the waiter being called / shoo away with a whistle / gestures or with respect?  Whether there is an expression of gratitude and respect while conversing with such people or it is of pride and arrogance.

To extend the principle further, how a person treats another, irrespective of his strata, his position, whether he is a stranger or not, in a situation which is not favourable,  when he is in a bad mood depicts important qualities of that person.

For me this is one of the most important and easily noticeable quality of a person.  What do you think?  Do you also observe such a behaviour in a person?  Which one as per you is the most important quality of a gentleman?  What else do you look at? Comments are welcomed.